Be warned of the Cluster B

There are some wounds that don't show up on the body. The bruises, the brokenness, the exhaustion- they show up in your spirit. And if you've ever been entangled with someone who fits within the Cluster B category of personality disorders, you know exactly what I mean.

This isn't just about narcissists. Cluster B includes narcissistic, borderline, histrionic, and antisocial personality disorders. These people are often charming on the outside but destructive to your soul. You don't see it coming- because you weren't raised to expect evil to wear a mask. And yet, here you are, confused, depleted, maybe even blaming yourself. I was too.

They are not misunderstood - They are Dangerous

One of the greatest deceptions is to believe that these individuals are simply "wounded" people who need more love." Don't get me wrong- everyone needs love and grace-but Cluster B individuals manipulate that grace.

They weaponize your empathy. They feed off your compassion. They mirror what you want to see and then punish you for trusting them.

The Bible warns us in 2 Timothy 3:2-5:

"People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive..... without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited... having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with such people."

Read that again: Have nothing to do with such people.

That is not cold. That is wisdom.

The Mother Wound and the Magnetic Pull

Many of us who fell prey to a Cluster B personality did so because of unresolved childhood wounds. We are the givers. The fixers. The ones who mistake trauma bonding for true love or loyalty. When you have a mother wound or a history of emotional neglect, the high-intensity rollercoaster of a Cluster B person feels familiar- and you may even call it "Home."

But, that's not home. That's a house built on sand and lit on fire!

You cannot save them. You were never meant to. That's God's job. Your job is to heal.

How they operate

• Love bombs and idolization. They place you on a pedestal so high you'll bleed when you fall.

• Devaluation and gaslighting. They rewrite history. They twist your words. They'll make you question your own memory and reality.

• Discard and destruction. Once you no longer serve their need for power, supply, or image- they will drop you. And then try to ruin your name.

They will lie. Cheat. Manipulate. Cry. Beg. Rage. Threaten. Plead. All in the same hour. And if you don't understand what you're dealing with, you'll think you are the problem.

You're not.

Know the fruit

Jesus told us in Matthew 7:16:

"By their fruit you will recognize them."

So if the fruit of the relationship is confusion, fear, control, lying, and emotional chaos, then the tree is rotten. And no matter how much you water it with your prayers, your time, your tears, or your sacrifice.... it will not produce good fruit.

God calls us to be wise as serpents and gentle as doves. To guard our hearts. To set boundaries. To flee from those who devour.

Protecting Your Space in Pregnancy, Birth, and Postpartum

Pregnancy and postpartum are sacred. You are spiritually open, physically vulnerable, and emotionally tender. This is when Cluster B personalities strike hardest. Why? Because your glow, your joy, your boundaries, your softness- it threatens their control.

Here are some Holy-Spirit-led strategies for protecting your space

1. Discern Before You Disclose

   Don't tell everyone your due date. Don't share your birth plan with people who thrive on chaos. Oversharing with toxic people gives them the power to sabotage or insert themselves in your sacred moment.

2. Create a 'No Drama' Birth Team

   Only allow people at your birth who bring peace, not tension. Even if it's your mother, your sister, or your in-law- if they bring fear, pressure, or manipulation, they don't belong in your birthing space.

3. Use Written Boundaries

Send a simple, loving message in advance that states your wishes:

"We'll be keeping the birth private and will reach out once we're ready for visitors. We appreciate your prayers and support during this time."

Let your midwife, doula, or support person be the gatekeeper so you don't have to manage this yourself.

4. Prepare for Postpartum Narcissism

Cluster B family members often act out the most after the baby arrives. They may:

• Compete with your bond

• Try to take over

• Undermine your choices

• Use guilt to access the baby

You are not overreacting. You are protecting your child.

5. Go No Contact or Low Contact Without Guilt

   This season is not about appeasing others- it's about guarding your womb, your baby, and your peace. Proverbs 4:23 reminds us:

   "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it."

   If that means keeping your distance for the sake of your sanity and your baby's well-being, so be it.

6. Anoint Your Home and Speak Life

This is not just natural battle-It's spiritual warfare. Anoint your doors with oil. Speak blessings over your birth space. Declare scriptures over your baby, your body, and your household. Let no unclean spirit or disruptive force enter.

You Are Not Alone

If you've survived a Cluster B relationship- whether it was with a partner, a parent, or even a spiritual leader, I want you to know something:

You are not crazy. You are not weak. You are a survivor.

And with God's help, you can become more that that. You can be restored.

Psalm 147:3 promises:

"He heals the brokehearted and binds up their wounds."

That includes your heart. Your identity. Your ability to love and trust again.

Final Words

Be warned of the Cluster B, but don't let it harden you. Let it refine you. Let it reveal to you how strong, how intuitive, and how divinely protected you are. And most of all, let it lead you back to the One who never lies, never manipulates, never abandons: Jesus Christ.

He is your safety and anchor.

Narcissistic husbands really wound. Their hatred, malicious attempts to hurt you, lie to you, and lie about you do not go unaccounted for.

God is counting every one of the tears you shed. Husbands are not to deal treacherously with their wives.